1. You blame outside circumstances for your situation.
  2. You do not see yourself as powerful.
  3. You have excuses for everything.
  4. You gossip rather than talk with the person directly.

Love didn't hurt you. Someone who didn't know how to love hurt you. Don't confuse the two.

You are only captive by walls created by your own hands.

Running away from the problem only creates distance from the solution.

"You must never limit your challenges, you must challenge your limits."

  1. "It is hopeless and I am helpless."
  2. "I can't..."
  3. "I have no power here."
  4. "I have tried, but I keep getting blocked."
  5. "It's no use."
  6. "Do you know what _____ did to me?"
You feel defeated by external circumstances. Your energy seems to have vanished and you have lost all confidence in making a difference.


  1. You have betrayed your own value and your own worth but you think it is someone else's fault for your feeling.
  2. You project all the positive qualities outside of yourself and internalize the negative.
  3. You think your energy away by not recognizing or acknowledging your own power - this creates a black hole.
  4. Giving up is your first thought.
  5. You feel that you have no control but you have given up.
  6. You feel betrayed - wronged or violated - by people's actions and lack of consideration.
  7. You have a lot of unspoken rules and a lot of unspoken lines that get crossed.
  8. You are like the kid who goes limp when you want to pick him up
  9. Your need for approval, for acknowledgement, for recognition, is never satisfied.
  10. You drain people.
  11. You are drained of energy because you don't have a strong enough core of positive thoughts about yourself.


  1. Own the fact that you have given up on yourself and that you can't expect someone to make up for your lack of self-worth; only you can make yourself whole.
  2. Do a review of your strengths. Write them down.
  3. Take action toward your goals even if they are small steps.
  4. Identify where you give your power away to a person or situation. What would happen if you didn't? Start taking action in that direction.
  5. Identify the shoulds, can'ts, and have-to's you always say. What rules or false beliefs keep you stuck?
  6. Begin to say "I want to" or "I choose not to" instead of "I can't."
  7. Have the conversation with whomever you have issues with rather than gossip about them.
  8. Forgive those who you think have betrayed you. Forgiveness is giving up your right for revenge forever.
  9. Recognize that you are, at your core, good.




© 2016 Jim Peal